I am going to share how I developed this model of working. I would sit in the counselling session, some clients talk a lot, some not so much! I have worked in schools and a college for 5 years and you can imagine that some teenagers can be even more extreme at times. I found that a good way of entering the clients world was to plot out their life on a large piece of paper.
As time went on, the themes we covered became more clear, commonalities were everywhere. I then decided to consolidate my approach into a model that can work for anyone.
Life is an intricate web of many interrelated parts that make the whole, the you. If one or more of these parts is out of balance or neglected completely then more often than not we feel unhappy, dissatisfied, out of kilter.
We know things feel wrong but are unsure why or how to make it better. This imbalance means that we use all sorts of coping mechanisms to self soothe. These are wide ranging and varied but here are a few examples:
• Avoid all social occasions
• Stay in your room/home
• Make your life shrink
• Self medicate with drink/drugs • Stop doing things
• Self harm • Give up
If we are able to identify which part is out of balance, then we can adjust it, a bit like balancing a wheel on a car. I have drawn up a ‘Compass’, with you at the centre and all your life parts on the circumference.
I have identified 8 parts that make up a balanced life, each one represents the most important components of a persons life. One part or many may be out of alignment.
The parts are:
1. Home life
2. Educational or work life
6. Digital life
The aim is to look at each ‘part’ in depth, see how you now feed it or starve it.
The next stage is to collect ideas about how that part of you could be nurtured and then you plan for how to address the missing elements.
Each part is taken in turn and can be worked on over the course of a week or a number of sessions. It is up to you!”
Taken from my Anxiety Workbook available on Amazon or copy link one my shop.
Photo: Photo Aron on Unsplash